In a conversation Carol (my girlfriend) and I had a long time ago, we decided that things would be far better than they are now if Jesus had been a potato instead of a human being. For one, potatoes cannot be crucified; they lack the proper limbs and are not prone to bleeding. Second, it would make transubstantiation, the belief that the wafers and Dollar Store wine at communion actually turn into the real body and blood of Christ, a lot less creepy - people eat potatoes, not other people. Speaking of communion, it would be far better with a potato as Jesus, since the body and blood would more or less be vodka and potato chips.
The only forseeable consequence is the near extinction of Irish Catholics, who would abandon their faith during the Irish Potato Famine. Seems like a small price to pay, though, for the spud messiah. Thoughts?
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